How to Help a Loved One Let Go When They Return from Military Duty
by www.Sedona.com
U.S. soldiers are deployed for 15-month combat tours (although this is supposed to change to 12 months in August), and marines for seven months. And after they and others in the military return from duty, readjusting to life in the states can be a challenge.
About 12 percent of soldiers suffer from anxiety, depression, post-combat stress and other problems during their first tour, according to an Army survey, and that rises to 27 percent of those on their third or fourth combat tours.
The long and repeated separations also take a toll on marriages, as more soldiers are reporting related marriage problems.
One of the best things for someone who has just gone through a traumatic event like combat to do is to learn how to let go of the negative images and experiences in their head, and the feelings associated with them, using The Sedona Method.
But they may not be ready to do this right off the bat. So what should you do?
“First off remember that whatever feelings they may be projecting at you are not actually about you. Do not take it personally,” says Hale Dwoskin, CEO and director of training of Sedona Training Associates.
“Next allow yourself to be there to listen to them and support them in feeling welcomed back into their home environment,” he continues. “Give them as much time as you can to allow them to acclimate to being home.”
Ultimately, it’s important to realize that engaging in and even just witnessing combat is a type of emotional trauma. And upon returning from military duty, your loved one may be experiencing a wide range of emotions, from grief to anxiety to shame and survivor’s guilt. And unless this trauma is healed, the scars from the past can continue to live in the present and the future.
So, when you suspect they are ready, introduce your loved one to The Sedona Method.
“If they are open to letting go, start with just the basics of welcoming the feeling,” Dwoskin says. “Then ask them, could they let it go? Would they let it go? And when? Keep it simple and give them lots of positive feedback. Let them know that whatever they are experiencing is natural and acceptable to you.”
As your loved one becomes accustomed to these beginning steps, you can help him or her release further with:
As you and your loved one use the Method, you will find over time that the very situations and experiences that you used to find the most painful or disturbing will become less and less so, until you may even find that they no longer have an impact on your life at all.
Sources
WashingtonPost.com
MSNBC.com
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